The ideal online dating pictures for dudes and women, Daily Mail Online

The perfect online dating pictures for men and women, Daily Mail Online

Published: 12:42 GMT, Two January 2014 | Updated: 11:14 GMT, Five January 2014

The guide to the flawless online dating picture, profile and etiquette arrives on the busiest day ever for the UK’s online dating industry.

Spurred on by the optimism that the Fresh Year brings, 1 million Britons are expected to get online for a date today – the very first day back in the office after the Christmas break. This time last year spotted a 94 per cent increase in people singing up compared to their daily average.

And now those looking for love can take note as the results of an in-depth examine of more than Four,000 online daters outlines the common features of the most popular dating site users.

An outdoorsy full-length shot is best for fellows, while indoor bod pictures get women 60% more messages

Total length shots attract 203% more attention than a cropped or face shot

A full-body photo will boost both sexes’ messages by an average 203 per cent. Meantime w omen should aim to take their pictures indoors, as this gets them 60 per cent more messages. Guys on the other palm get Nineteen per cent more messages if their pictures are taken outside.

A selfie will get women four per cent more messages, but boys eight per cent fewer.

‘One of my pet hates is studs posting selfies as their profile pictures on online dating websites,’ says travel writer and online dater Sarah Gordon.


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‘In my practice, selfies on dating sites either involve the stud snapping a quick picture of himself as he explosions his profile (no effort made) or unclothing off in a desperate attempt to demonstrate off his buff figure while attempting out a moody masculine model look (far too much effort made).

‘I’d much rather see a picture of a nice smiling fellow on a night out with friends or on holiday than one who has clearly spent too much time in front of a mirror in his bedroom. Have some selfie respect.’

But boys don’t mind so much when women post selfies, as it’s ‘more acceptable’.

‘When it comes to pictures, it all depends,’ says online dater Kent Adams.

‘For me personally a selfie on a profile gives you a brief understanding of how a person portrays themselves.

When a woman takes a selfie it’s fine because it’s considered the norm for them to do that – and get away with it.

‘But if I plastered a profile with selfies it may come across as narcissistic or vain.’

Posing with animals or your best friends might seem adorable but it actually reduces your popularity by 53 per cent and 42 per cent respectively – for both sexes.

Online dater Sarah hates it when fellows post selfies – it’s either too much or too little effort

Once you get past the conundrum of pictures comes the words on your profile.

The fresh research by dating site Zoosk comes to the conclusion that while honesty truly is the best policy for dudes, it’s not such a good idea for women to talk about exes and children. They should wait to divulge details later.

Mentions of words like divorce and separate gets fellows 52 per cent more messages, while son or daughter gets a seven per cent boost.

For women, tho’, the same words get a seven per cent dip in message flow.

‘I choose it when women wait a bit before exposing too much about their past relationships or children and let us get to know them as an individual very first,’ says Chris Hines, who met his gf on Slew Of Fish.

‘In the end it’s about you as a duo and if you find out that you’re suited then the other person will most likely be more accepting of the rest. Too soon tho’ and you might not get the chance to showcase how awesome you are. In the end the right person will accept you for who you are, baggage and all.’

The dating site found users were more successful keeping it brief and sweet.

Profiles with 100 to 200 words received Ten per cent more messages, and users with positive identifiers such as certain and outgoing, received 23 per cent more incoming messages and Four per cent more replies to their outgoing ones.

Posing with your fur covered friend may seem lovely but it will get you 53 per cent fewer messages

Discussing exercise and reading on your dating profile gets both sexes 21 per cent more messages, while talking about musicality gets 15 per cent more.

‘It’s encouraging when you see a profile where a man specified books, music and fitness as interests because it makes them emerge well rounded,’ says online dater Lauren Keith, who is presently dating someone she met on Slew Of Fish.

‘It’s off-putting when a man only seems interested in going out with his mates and getting tipsy. I think it also shows that they’re actually thinking about what women may want to hear and putting a real effort into their profile.

‘Some boys seem to rely on a few attractive photos to get messages – you can tell the ones actively seeking a relationship from those who aren’t!’

It has come to light that o nce you begin messaging, emojis are not all bad. But the type of smiley you use is crucial.

While 🙂 sees a 13 per cent boost in messages, 🙂 sees a crucial 66 per cent dip in replies.

Women who are more forward, using phrases like dinner, drinks or lunch in the very first message get 73 per cent more replies, while boys should play it cooler. Those who mention the same words in their opening message get 35 per cent fewer replies.

The use of flirty words like baby and beautiful see women’s response rates rocket by 118 per cent and 50 per cent respectively. But guys who do the same get Ten per cent and 13 per cent fewer replies.

Oliver’s 🙂 smiley could lose him 66 per cent message potential, but his good punctuation earns him points

Make sure to see your spelling and grammar. Text speak and illiteracy make both sexes 13 per cent less successful.

‘From one word “alrite”s to laughable imitations of utter sentences, illiterate messages are infuriating,’ says MailOnline’s online dating blogger Daphne.

‘Spelling mistakes I can live with, but if you treatment online dating with text speak the only way you’re getting a reply is if you’ve got limited wifi because you’re volunteering in rural Africa, or Joe Manganiello. Look him up. You’re welcome.’

Illiteracy loses 13 per cent of replies

Is there an echo here?

Now you’ve got the instruments, if you’re single and looking for love this is the best time to get your online profile set up.

Kate Taylor, resident relationship experienced at, said: ‘It’s the time of year when we vow to eat more healthily, exercise more frequently and budget better.

‘As the Christmas festivities tranquil down and we re-evaluate our lives, it’s little wonder that looking for a fucking partner will top the list of Fresh Year priorities for many single people.

‘If you make sure you’re online during the busiest time of the entire year you’ll have an even better chance of meeting someone special.’’s relationship pro Kate Taylor comments

Why are outdoor photos of studs likely to be more popular, but less so for women?

Studs choose indoor-selfies of women because they look pretty in them – the lighting is flattering and soft, and the entire mood of a home selfie is intimate and slightly private. It’s sexy!

Women choose outdoors shots of boys because they’re likely to be taken by a friend (which shows that he’s social and popular), and very likely display him doing something active and rugged (which we also like).

Why are profile pictures with more than one person in them a turn-off?

At, we’ve found that people simply don’t have time to probe a photograph to work out which one is you! It’s also far less intimate and attractive to use a group shot – always recall that the person viewing your profile will be attempting to imagine themselves with you. Not you and your legions of friends. It’s the online equivalent of bringing your mates along on a very first date.

Why should you speak more about your own interests than what you’re looking for in a playmate?

Because people viewing your profile will be hoping to get a sense of your lifestyle – and how they can fit into it. They don’t want to feel like an item on a supermarket shelf that you might simply pass by because it’s not on your list. Describe yourself as a person – how you like to spend your time, what you love to do. That’s attractive.

Why is spelling significant?

Good spelling implies you’re intelligent but more importantly it shows you’ve taken care and effort writing your profile. A hastily-written page total of abbreviations suggests you’re not taking it gravely, or that it’s something you flung up online while you were bored. That suggests you won’t take dating earnestly either. Good spelling shows that you are thoughtful and considered.

S ix tips for a good online opener from our dating blogger Daphne

1. Keep it brief. The opener should be light and effortless, you don’t want to give away your life story.

Two. Comment on something specific to the profile to stop the message from feeling too copied and pasted. But also don’t comment on something too demonstrable, like ‘The picture from Fresh York looks nice. When were you there?’ This is boring.

Three. Use decent spelling/punctuation/grammar for the very first message at least, then you can mimic their response. A you’re/your error is glaring and a turn off.

Four. Send a message that shows me you’re interested in me as a person, not just looks. You can compliment me in the very first message. Refrain from being too blatant, but compliment something specific, i.e. ‘You have stellar dress sense’ rather than ‘You’re so beautiful’.

Five. Personally, I react to comments more than queries. Most of the time boys ask the same boring questions, so it’s refreshing to just get a statement.

6. Do actually send a message. I may come across as picky and judgmental, but you need to get yourself heard. Likes/views/want to meets are too passive. I’m online dating for a reason 🙂

Kylie* and Daphne*, authors o f The Online Dating Diaries blog, dissect the ups, downs and rearwards ways of internet dating – and more. They are now blogging for MailOnline. Read more on The Online Dating Diaries here and via the button on the FEMAIL homepage.

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